Planes! Get out of my airspace.

In France no one calls me a fat jerk! I'm a gourmand!

Oh Bart, don't worry, people die all the time. In fact, you could wake up dead tomorrow.

Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is: never try.

— Dad, don’t act like Mussolini.
— Ooh, I thought I was doing Donald Trump.

I like to cry at the ocean, because only there do my tears seem small.

— Well at least I went down like a man.
You look like a Malaysian transsexual.

— What are you doing, boy?
— Reading prayers and ignoring them, just like God.

Look, Marge! Maggie lost her baby legs!

Bart's a tub, Lisa's weak as a little girl and Maggie doesn't seem to be growing at all!

— Awww, I hate folding sheets.
— That's your underwear.

Ah. I'm just a big, toasty cinnamon bun. I never want to leave this bed.

To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems!

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.

Boys don't have feelings, they have muscles.

I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman!