Alcohol (drug) Quotes

Show me the man who is both sober and happy, and I will show you the crinkled anus of a lying asshole.

— What is your nationality?
— I'm a drunkard.
— And that makes Rick a citizen of the world.

What? You think a first-class girl can't drink?

— I want it wall to wall with John Daniels.
— Don't you mean Jack Daniels?
— He may be Jack to you son, but when you've known him as long as I have... that's a joke.

Alone and embarrassed... I decided to get roaring...drunk.

— How are you?
— I'm fine.
— So am I.
— Well, goodbye.
— Goodbye.
— A glass of wine.
— A whiskey, please.
— Big, big glass.
— Double.

And when you come to the end of the line with a buddy who is more than a brother and a little less than a wife, getting blind drunk together is really the only way to say farewell.