Your problem isn't making bad choices. It's that you identify the good choice and then intentionally do the opposite. You see, behind this boorish bravado of yours is a paralysing fear
of letting anyone into your life. And it isn't because you weren't loved when you were a kid. You're so egocentric that the love wasn't enough. So you pulled pigtails and you pushed the fat kids into the dirt so no one could ignore little Perry. Well, little Perry is now 40 years old and is so invested in this narcissistic notion of yourself as "loner" that you can't quit. And you'll just keep dumping on everyone around you until eventually, and please, trust me on this, there won't be anyone left.