My pop, he weren't a religious man, you know? If you couldn't grow it, kill it, or eat it, he just plain old didn't believe in it. And this one time he head on up the old Saba hills. San Saba hills?
He joined a couple Texas Ranger buddies of his to hunt. Pretty routine. He done it like a hundred times before. Should have been a 3-day kill, but on the second day, it all went fucked. Somehow that night he lost his buddies. And to top it off... them Comanches went and took the horses. So he was starving and delirious... and he crawls up into this mott, this... group of trees out in the middle of nowhere just sticking up in this ocean of scrub... and he found religion. At that moment, he told me... he found God. Uh-huh. And it turns out that God... He's a squirrel. Yeah. A big, old meaty one. "I found God," he used to say. "And while sitting there and basking in the glory and sublimity of mercy... I shot and ate that son of a bitch."

— Ever used one ofthese before?
— Just 'cause I'm a school teacher, don't make me a pussy.
— Ladies, a fying extraterrestrial's in the store. Can we focus?
<...>
— Grab the girl. I'll get the bird.
— All right! Nice shot.
— So what do you want? Light meat or dark?
— You have to ask? It's dead now?

— Rex just fed, so he won't be hunting for a while.
— Just fed? I assume you're talking about Eddie? You might show a little more respect, the man saved our lives by giving his.
— Then his troubles are over. My point is, predators don't hunt when they're not hungry.
— No, only humans do.
— Oh, you're breaking our hearts! Saddle up, let's get this moveable feast under way!