The Alibi (2006)

— Here's a new spin. If one in four men cheats on their wives Then three in four are faithful And even more admirable nine in ten women. Not bad odds to play. So no more Jack no more Alibis, no more worries. Just the thought of waking up every morning and hearing...
— You are such an asshole.

— What the hell was wrong with the other fifteen bodies that I showed you?
— I just wanted to make sure it was a good match.
— You just couldn't stand the idea of You not leaving a good looking corpse. Vatiny's gonna be the death of you, Ray.
— Let's hope.

What good is it for man to have faith, if his actions do not prove it. Con men don't reform. They simply find better angles.

— Lies are the great foundation of our society, Lola. 'Great outfit, honey.' 'Can't I give you flowers for no reason?' And my personal favorite, 'Don't worry, it happens to lots of guys.'
— But that's just being polite.
— Fact is your average relationship wouldn't last two minutes if people told the truth. We just help maintain the illusion. Mom's happy, Dad's happy and the kids don't have to pick sides at Christmas.
— So this is all for the children, then?
— Families don't break up because of infidelity, They break up because someone get caught.
— Let me guess, You're just a hard-working child of a broken home trying to save others from the pain you went through.
— I just see people for the well dressed, good smelling animals they are. Mate, eat, sleep and mate some more, preferably with someone else. Come on.
— But you can't really believe that. Not everyone operate on a purely primal level.

— A man is as faithful as his opportunities. Take your old boss, for example.
— Perfect example. Yes, he cheated on his wife they broke up. They got back together they never been happier
— When was that, about a year ago? Yeah, How did you know that?
— He just bought us lunch. Been a client since January.

— Ten days, Ray. Ten days I had sleep with my wife. You got any idea how that is?
— Break the rules, these thing happen. By the way, you'll be swapping the necklace You gave her with a real one in about two days. I've already billed your account.
— You realize I actually had to... I shudder just thinking about it.
— You could always leave her, Robert.
— Hey I'd leave, I'd leave in a heartbeat, it's no secret the money's all from her family. I leave, I'm ruined you know that.
— We all have our crosses to bear, right? Now, for our lesson in remedial cheating. Nothing from your liaisons goes in your pockets, on your breath or on your skin. Got it?

— Did you ever get a blow job at a hundred miles an hour?
— We're only going sixty.
— Then you better step on it.

— Say Michael, you ever talk to that tax shelter guy... What was his name, Jack something?
— No I was hoping you could tell me I got so much loose change tied up with that guy. Now I can't get the bastard on the phone. So you know what Jack used to say the only sure investment is tombstone.
— I know what it means.

— I need a piece.
— A piece of what?
— You know a gun.
— Oh why do you say that Snoop Dog?

Okay, maybe I'm no Casanova. And maybe I'm in way over my head. But this was always Jack's job I was the pencil pusher. The statistical expert. Unfortunately, being able to tell you that seven and ten murders of crimes of passion or three and four hitmen are hired by one spouse to kill the other isn't terrily relevant information. Unless of course you are the one they are hired to kill. Jack was right, I should never have gone straight.

— Why don't you get in the tub with me? I know these things that we can do with the water jets. I tell you what...
— Trust me when I'm done with you You're going to need ice.

I've learned not to rely on a single person in this world. I'm relying on a dozen. Mostly cheats, killers and cons. And I happen to trust these people. Or at least trust on their baser instincts. Let's hope they don't disappoint me.