If you were waiting for the opportune moment... that was it.

— You are, without doubt, the worst pirate I've ever heard of.
— But you have heard of me.

— This is either madness or brilliance.
— It's remarkable how often those two traits coincide. Everyone, stay calm. We are taking over the ship.

— Why is the rum gone?
— One, because it is a vile drink that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels. Two, that signal is over a thousand feet high. The entire Royal Navy is out looking for me. Do you really think that there is even the slightest chance — that they won't see it?
— But why is the rum gone?

— Well, well, Jack Sparrow, isn't it?
— Captain Jack Sparrow, if you please!
— Well, I don't see your ship, captain.
— I'm in the market, as it were.

— This dock is off limits to civilians.
— I'm terribly sorry. I didn't know. If I see one, I shall inform you immediately.

— What's your purpose in Port Royal, Mr. Smith?
— And no lies.
— Why, then I confess. It is my intention to commandeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in Tortuga, raid, pillage, plunder, and otherwise pilfer my weaselly black guts
— I said «no lies!»
— I think he's telling the truth.
— If he were telling the truth, he wouldn't have told us.
— Unless of course you wouldn't believe the truth even if he told it to you.

— Put it away, son. It's not worth you getting beat again.
— You didn't beat me. You ignored the rules of engagement. In a fair fight, I'd kill you.
— Then that's not much incentive for me to fight fair, then, is it'?

Stop blowing holes in my ship!

— You're the one they're hunting. The pirate.
— You seem somewhat familiar. Have I threatened you before?
— I make a point of avoiding familiarity with pirates.
— Well, it would be a shame to put a black mark on your record. So if you'll excuse me?

— Who are you?
— No one. He's no one. A distant cousin of my aunt's nephew twice removed. Lovely singing voice, though. Eunuch.

That's not very nice.

It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're gonna do something incredibly stupid.

— Where's Elizabeth?
— She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry Norrington, just like she promised. And you get to die for her, just like you promised. So we're all men of our word, really. Except for Elizabeth, who is, in fact, a woman.