Boris Grushenko

— But if there is no God, then life has no meaning. Why go on living? Why not just commit suicide?
— Well, let's not get hysterical. I could be wrong. I'd hate to blow my brains out, then see they found something.

— Nothingness. Non-existence. Black emptiness.
— What did you say?
— Oh, I was just planning my future.

— Remember that nice boy next door? Raskolnikov?
— Yeah?
— He killed two ladies.
— No! What a nasty story.
— Bobick told it to me. He heard it from one of the Karamazov brothers.
— He must have been possessed.
— Well, he was a raw youth.
— Raw youth? He was an idiot.
— And he acted insulted and injured.
— I hear he was a gambler.
— You know, he could be your double.
— Really? How novel.

Don't get me wrong, I love him like a brother. Just not one of mine.

— Are you suggesting passive resistance?
— No, I'm suggesting active fleeing.

— One, two! One, two! One, two!
— Three is next, if you're having any trouble.

— What are you going to do when the French soldiers rape your sister?
— I don't have one.
— That's no answer.
— They won't rape Ivan. They'd throw up.

— Any news of cousin Sonja?
— Only that she and Voskovec are unhappy and she takes lovers.
— She takes uppers?
— Lovers.
— Oh, lovers.

— Sex without love is an empty experience.
— Yes, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.

— What's a Jew?
— You never saw a Jew? Here, I have some sketches. There are Jews.
— No kidding! They all have these horns?
— No. This is the Russian Jew. The German Jew has these stripes.

— You're a tyrant and a dictator and you start wars.
— Why is he reciting my credits?

— You think I was made in God's image? You think he wears glasses?
— Not with those frames.

Wow! The battle looks completely different when you're in the middle of it than it does to the generals up on the hill.

— My seconds will call on your seconds.
— My seconds will be out. Have 'em call on my thirds. If my thirds are out, go to my fourths.

The difference is that all men go eventually, but I go six o'clock tomorrow morning. I was supposed to go at five o'clock, but I have a smart lawyer. Got leniency.