Santa Claus Quotes

How low! Giving Kriss Kringle a parking ticket on Christmas Eve! What's next, rabies shots for the Easter Bunny?

— I know you're not the real Santa Claus.
— Huh, what makes you say that? Just out of curiosity.
— I'm old enough to know how it works. But I also know you work for him. I'd like you to give him a message.
— Shoot.
— Kevin McCallister, 681 Lincoln Blvd. Do you need the phone number?
— No, that's all right.
— This is extremely important. Please tell him instead of presents, I just want my family back. No toys. Nothing but Peter, Kate, Buzz, Megan, Linnie and Jeff. And my aunt and my cousins. And if he has time, my Uncle Frank. Okay?