Barney Stinson: — So how'd it all go down between you and Bilson?
Marshall Eriksen: — Well, after he proposed a vocational paradigm shift, I made an impromptu presentation using a four-pronged approach that really brought him to his knees.
Barney Stinson: — Hit him with a chair?
Marshall Eriksen: — Yep.

— If I could nail any celebrity, it would be Lily, because she's the star of my heart.
— Aw! Mine would be Hugh Jackman.