50/50

— The relationship that I have with Rachael is about more than sex.
— What is it about, Adam?
— It's about each other. You know, we care about each other, we talk to each other. It's great.
— Wouldn't it be nice if you could do that, and then bang the hell out of each other — afterwards?
— Ideally, yes. But it's not a perfect world, okay?

— I mean, okay, my mom... I don't know. She's a crazy person. She just worries all day every day. And honestly it annoys the shit out of me. It's way too much. And it's not helpful and I can't talk to her. I don't call her back.
— It's a problem. So she's got this husband that can't talk to her and this son that won't?
— Yeah, I guess.
— Makes you kind of a dick.

— If I was your girlfriend, you know what I would be doing? I'd be sucking your cock every thirty minutes. I'd be baking you fucking cookies all day and shit.
— What kind of cookies?
— Any kind.
— You'd make me snickerdoodle cookies?
— I'd bathe you in snickerdoodle cookies.

You... She stays at your house all the time. She leaves her fucking shit everywhere. You clean it up, you're a nice person. The least she could do is fellate you.