Kevin McCallister

This house is so full of people it makes me sick! When I grow up and get married, I'm living alone! I'm living alone!

Bless this nutritious, microwaveable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it on sale.

— I know you're not the real Santa Claus.
— Huh, what makes you say that? Just out of curiosity.
— I'm old enough to know how it works. But I also know you work for him. I'd like you to give him a message.
— Shoot.
— Kevin McCallister, 681 Lincoln Blvd. Do you need the phone number?
— No, that's all right.
— This is extremely important. Please tell him instead of presents, I just want my family back. No toys. Nothing but Peter, Kate, Buzz, Megan, Linnie and Jeff. And my aunt and my cousins. And if he has time, my Uncle Frank. Okay?

No clothes on anybody. Sickening!

You can mess with a lot of things, but you can't mess with kids on Christmas.

Guys, I'm eating junk and watching rubbish! You better come out and stop me!

lf you aren't going to use your heart, then what's the difference if it gets broken?

l don't think people mean to forget. l think it just happens. My grandfather says if my head wasn't screwed on, l'd leave it on the school bus.

— l stopped trusting people.
— No offense, but that seems like sort of a dumb thing to do.
— l was afraid of getting my heart broken again. You see, sometimes you can trust a person, and then, when things are down, they forget about you.
— Maybe they're just too busy. Maybe they don't forget about you, but they forget to remember you.
— l'm just afraid if l do trust someone, l'll get my heart broken again.
— l understand that. l used to have this really nice pair of rollerblades. l was afraid if l wore them, l'd wreck them. So l kept them in a box. Do you know what happened? l outgrew them. l never wore them once outside. l just wore them in my room a couple times. lf you aren't going to use your heart, then what's the difference if it gets broken? lf you just keep it to yourself, maybe it'll be like my rollerblades. When you do decide to try it, it won't be any good. You should take a chance. Got nothing to lose. Your heart might still be broken, but it isn't gone.

— It's scary out there.
— Ain't much better in here, kid.

— Buzz...
— Don't you know how to knock, phlegm-wad?
— Can I sleep here? I don't want to sleep with Fuller. If he drinks, he'll wet the bed.
— I wouldn't let you sleep in my room if you were growing on my ass.