Snatch

You should never underestimate the predictability of stupidity.

Pikeys are well-known for their skills of negotiation in business. It's probably why they talk like that...so you can't follow what's being said.

— Boris the Blade? As in Boris the Bullet-Dodger?
— Why do they call him the Bullet-Dodger?
— 'Cause he dodges bullets, Avi.

— You take sugar?
— No, thank you, Turkish. I'm sweet enough.

Boris the Blade, or Boris "The Bullet Dodger." As bent as the Soviet sickle, and as hard as the hammer that crosses it. Apparently, it's just impossible to kill the bastard.

— How do we wanna get rid of him?
— Do you want to shoot him?
— It's a little noisy, isn't it?
— Do you want to stab him?
— That's a little cold-blooded, isn't it?
— Do you want to kill him or not?

— I ain't fucking buying that.
— That's handy because I ain't fucking selling it. It's a fact.

Heavy, isn't it? Heavy is good. Heavy is reliable. If it doesn't work, you can always hit him with it.

— Why did you that?
— I didn't see it there.
— It's a four ton truck, Tyrone. It's not as though it's a packet of f***ing peanuts, now, is it?

They could charm the paint off walls, these fellas.

— And how could it find them?
— Well, I don't know. I'm not a dog, Sol. Ask him. It's like he's a fucking homing beacon.

— Should I call you Bullet? Tooth?
— You can call me Susan if it makes you happy.

— Will he be all right?
— I hope not.

— So, what you doing here?
— I'm taking the dog for a walk. What's the problem?
— What's in the car?
— Seats and a steering wheel.

— What's happening with them sausages, Charlie?
— Five minutes, Turkish.
— It was two minutes five minutes ago.

Ever crossed the road and looked the wrong way? And hey presto, a car's nearly on you, so what do you do? You freeze. And your life doesn't flash before your eyes, 'cause you're too f***ing scared to think — you just freeze, and pull a stupid face. The pikey didn't — why? Because he had plans on running the car over.