Believe me, I did not want that, because I had a good life before you. Well, not good, but it was okay. Well, it was empty, actually, but at least I was blissfully unaware of how miserable I was!

— I'm the one who's in a real relationship! You're the one who lies for a living! You think you're so smart, but you don't know anything! Did you really think you'd never get caught. You could've been happy but you blew it. Now you try to act like it's everyone else's fault, but it's all you. And now you think Colorado's the answer?
— You know, Kit, just because you finally convinced a guy to sleep with you more than once doesn't make you an expert on relationships.

Paula: — How about lunch tomorrow?
Tripp: — Sure. Wait. Tomorrow's Saturday.
Paula: — Sometimes I eat on Saturdays.

— I hate this.
— I know. I do too. So... So let's just get it over with, then.
— Okay, look, I know I'm a girl and I'm supposed to be better at this emotional crap but I'm not, so I'm just gonna say it. I'm sorry that I pointed out to you that you fell in love with a client and that made you go crazy and turn into a total bitch.
— Wow. That must've been really hard for you to say.
— I thought it was going to be, but I just kind of breezed right through it.
— Well, thanks. And, um, I'm sorry that I pointed out you haven't had a real relationship for the last five years because I'm the only person who can tolerate your bizarre and violent mood swings.