Lawrence Garfield

— Can we speak frankly?
— No. Lie to me. Tell me how thrilled you are to know me. I always speak frankly. I hate people who say, «can we speak frankly?» It means they're bullshitting the rest of the time.

— Come on, Lawrence. This is your game. Winner takes all. Rumor has it you got balls.
— I been trying to show you for weeks.
— Well, here's your opportunity.

I love money. I love money more than I love the things it can buy. Does that surprise you? Money. It don't care whether I'm good or not. It don't care whether I snore or not. It don't care which God I pray to. There are only three things in this world with that kind of unconditional acceptance... dogs... Doughnuts... And money. Only money is better. You know why? Because it don't make you fat and it don't poop all over the living room floor. There's only one thing I like better... Other people's money.