— There are a million women out there.
— I don't want a million — I just want one. The perfect one.

Look, lady... I only speak English and bad English!

Don't shoot me, please. I'm on a vacation.

— Humans act so strange.
— What do you mean?
— Everything you created is used to destroy.
— We call it human nature. You learn that on your screen?
— I'm not finished yet. I'm up to «V».
— «V» is good. Some good words in «V».
— Like what?
— «Valiant». «Vulnerable». «Very beautiful».

— Excuse me, I'm looking for a priest.
— Weddings are one floor down. Congratulations.

— You've got a message.
— Yes.
— Not opening it? Could be important.
— Like the last two were important. First one was from my wife telling me she's leaving. The second was from my lawyer telling me he was leaving with my wife.
— That is bad luck. But grandfather say: «It never rain everyday». This is good news, guaranteed. I bet you lunch.
— Okay.
— Come on. «You are fired». Oh, I'm sorry.
— Well. At least I won lunch.
— Good philosophy. See good in bad. I like.

I'm all for conversation, but maybe you can just shut up for a minute!

— Oh, yeah, I forgot. You still prefer your cat to the real thing.
— At least, the cat comes back.

— Are you classified as human?
— Negative. I am a meat Popsicle.

Anybody else want to negotiate?

— Boom.
— Boom. Yeah, I understand «boom».
— Bada boom.